Wednesday, February 22, 2006

You are who I think you are

As you may have noticed, the Malcontent's built up a solid roster of contributors. A little background on each:

Stanley Roper: Though he's generations younger than the late Norman Fell, Stanley got his moniker after wearing an outfit that mirrored the causual Jewish chic worn by the "Three's Company" landlord. Despite "Stanley's" protestations, the name's stuck. And now he's got his own blog;

Markie Post: Years ago, our Frogtown correspondent sported a facsimile of the "Night Court" pin-up's female mullet. My memory is long and unforgiving;

Bobby Bubbles: When he isn't cultivating new pyramid schemes ("octagons of opportunity," as he calls it), the Double B is a consistent source for some of my more exotic material;

Ms. Ellie: We used to visit South Fork daily while in college. Having missed out on "Dallas" the first-time around, I got hooked while an undergrad, and Ms. Ellie came along for the ride. Perhaps you'd enjoy our Sue Ellen/J.R. mimicry: "J.R., which slut are you going to sleep with tonight?" "I don't know, but she's got to be a helluva lot more interesting than the slut I'm looking at now." One day, I fear, she'll take the act too far, lobbing a bottle of Jack at my conniving head;

Reginald van Osteen: L.A.-based photographer by day, Reggie is better known as the world's foremost craftsmen of cigarette holders. He's developing a show for one of those off-brand cable channels showcasing his unique skill;

Al Kosa: Formerly one of the ATL's premier car dealers, Al's famously bigger than life. He's dated his share of Hooters' waitresses, acquiring plenty of acolytes along the way. But Al's a one-man posse, armed with plenty of jewelry and a mean-spirited sense of humor.

Bitchy Jon from Castro: He's not really bitchy, nor gay, but his name is Jon and he once lived near the Castro district. He's married to ...

Molly Berg, socialist prude: Again, she's neither a socialist nor a prude, but this psuedonym once drove a sensible mini-station wagon. And a monker was born.

Nurse Hall: Although she doesn't care much for children, or for public health, Ms. Hall knows how to hold her job as a school nurse. Sleeping with the principal helps, but she doesn't stop there.

***We're still negotiating with the late Howard Cosell.

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