Tuesday, April 25, 2006

The Puritans are coming! The Puritans aren't cumming!

Better lock up your dildoes if you reside in the Palmetto state, as the state legislature has moved to ban sex toys.

Lucy’s Love Shop employee Wanda Gillespie said she was flabbergasted that South Carolina’s Legislature is considering outlawing sex toys.

The South Carolina bill, proposed by Republican Rep. Ralph Davenport, would make it a felony to sell devices used primarily for sexual stimulation and allow law enforcement to seize sex toys from raided businesses.

People convicted under obscenity laws face up to five years in prison and a $10,000 fine.

South Carolina law borrows from a 1973 U.S. Supreme Court ruling to define obscene as something "contemporary community standards" determine as "patently offensive" sexual conduct, which "lacks serious literary, artistic, political or scientific value."

Certainly South Carolina faces no other problems bigger than this. But the Christian right must be appeased.


  1. That metalic sound you heard was women accross America locking their night stands.

  2. That metalic sound you heard was women accross America locking their night stands.

  3. Oops. I apologize for that stutter. Apparantly I have been subliminally shaken... ah, if only at a high rate of oscillation... which is soon to be banned in SC.

  4. I hope they get rid of those vibrators soon so they can spend more time arresting the drug dealers selling crack to 10 year olds.
    I'm sure the sex toy thing is creating quite a back log and taking time away from more serious crime.

  5. Anonymous10:15 AM

    The Christian right and the "morally correct" have nothing better to do than stick their noses into what people do with their bodies in their own bedrooms. Living one's religion quietly and setting an example thereby is one thing. But enacting laws that limit others in this way is quite another. The day is coming when it will be THESE "moral" folks who are marginalized and dis-empowered. Small-minded, herd-mentality, self-righteous prigs.