You got a permit for that beer?

Another dispatch from Malcontenter Markie Post:

From the "Don't go writin' hot checks down in Mississippi" category:

Lumpkin (a k a "Bumpkin") County reputedly is the most stringent enforcer of any sort of DUI laws in north Georgia. Here are three examples of actual DUI convictions in the past couple of years:

*One fellow was drinking his beer while mowing his lawn on a riding mower. (He was convicted and jokingly called it an MUI -- mowing under the influence.)

*Another guy was a bit inebriated while riding his horse. Again, a conviction, which goes on his driving record as a DUI. (Lucky for him there wadn't no "Brokeback Mountain" monkeyshines going on or he'd a got the chair.)

*Another good ole boy was in fact drunk as a cooter and sitting in his pickup truck --- not an unusual pasttime up here. He was arrested and convicted in spite of the fact that there was no engine in the carcas of his innard-less vehicle.