Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Smashing melons


I've been recruited to speak to a bunch of high schoolers at career day. What to talk about? The low pay and long hours??

A co-worker has advised I share some anecdotes about my encounters with celebrities. Paul Newman probably wouldn't impress them (isn't he the guy who makes the popcorn?) Emilio Estevez ... doubt it. Duran Duran? A generation too late. Kathy Bates? Now I'm reaching.

I guess I could relay tales from my memorable interview with Gallagher and his brother, Gallagher II, who at the time were fighting in court over which one came up with the bright idea to smash watermelons. Gallagher claimed it was he who first introduced mallet to fruit. His brother, who would appear in secondary venues (think Toldeo) beneath Gallagher, said it was his idea; their father agreed with Gallagher II.

I saved the tape, by the way.

Maybe the young people will enjoy hearing about my sit-down with one of the two actors who played the drummer on "The Partridge Family." He brought along a few souvenirs, including a P-Fam lunch box and some old copies of "Tiger Beat." Not surprisingly, he hadn't heard from Susan Dey in years.

Or I suppose it might be appropriate, with the Super Bowl coming up, to talk about my interview with the late Walter Payton, a.k.a. "Sweetness." It began ominously and only got worse. Yeah, I stepped on his $200 sunglasses, but did he need to leave them laying on the floor? He paid me back by passing gas, loudly, throughout our time together.

Might I suggest med school?

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